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Another week, another win for my merry band of miscreants in
the Fantasy Baseball Search Expert League.
This time, I caught starting pitching guru Evan Dickens on an off week
and swept all five pitching categories on my way to a 7-3 victory. The win puts me back in first place in my
division as we reach the quarter point of the season, thus setting me up for a
devastating collapse later on. Pride
cometh before the fall indeed.
But my stellar performance in the league isn’t what I want
to talk about today (and it’s almost certainly not what you want to read). Instead, let’s discuss the most annoying
things that can occur during a head-to-head matchup.
The H2H format magnifies every little event during the
course of the baseball season. A play
that’s barely noteworthy or ignored completely under a roto format can cause a
fantasy manager to have a Kiefer Sutherland level meltdown in a H2H league (the
recent head-butt story is just further proof that there is a Vonnegutesque
blending of fact and fiction going on here.
Jack Bauer is coming to life.
Christmas trees and terrorists, beware).
It’s because the impact of a misstep is felt immediately and
can’t be made up for over the course of the full schedule. It’s also because players who prefer the H2H
format tend to be action junkies and far less rational than their roto-playing
counterparts (I have absolutely no proof of this, but like any good lawyer,
I’ll stick to it til I die).
So here is one H2H player’s countdown of the five most annoying
things that can happen during the course of a week. I find that the more unlikely the event, the
angrier I get, so the list is ordered accordingly. I’m sure I’m missing something, so a more
expansive version may be coming in the future, but here is what I’ve got for now.